Thursday, May 5, 2011

Sh*t I Found In The Junk Drawers.


  • A Tampax coupon for $1 off - that expired June 2005.
  • Raffi - Singable Songs for the Very Young cassette tape. No cover.
  • 2 child-don't-put-knives-in-the-outlet safety plug plastic doolallers.
  • A paid reciept from a cartoon the pixies father got paid for.
  • A "Judical Interim Release Order" against the pixies father - July 2004. (Oh, memories of being terrorized by the one you love.***)
  • 2 undeveloped instant cameras.
  • 80 kabajillion rubber bands.
  • A welfare stub from Feb 2005.
  • Many "moist toilettes" with Colonel Sanders smiling face.
  • Many packets of soy and plum sauce.
  • 6 different fairy themed temporary tattoos
  • a little black crawly bug. (uuuugh.)
  • The plastic lid of a toddler sippy cup.
  • 3 books of cheques with my former-married name on them.
  • 26 metal curtain hooks.
  • A handful of penny and nickle paper rollers.
  • Dusty candles.
  • Loose and random batteries.
  • 4 rubber Christmas placemats that I used to be SO proud of.
  • So. Much. More. Crap.
No bloody wonder It's taken me 6 years to get around to cleaning it out. Who knew so much joy and pain and baggage was hiding in there? (Yeah, I probably subconsciously did.) But, as I write, the kitchen table still looks like this:
So I had better get my arse in gear.

~Lori

*** To be completely fair, he would probably argue that I wasn't particularly loving and that I terrorized him just as much. However, I finished with playing fair about 2.5 years ago. Not bitchy about it. Just indifferent.

2 comments:

bruce said...

"you can tell a lot about a person by the stuff they have in a junk drawer..."

actually i think that is a buncha bs...

we all keep stuff we should pitch, and the stuff we keep may say something about us, but mostly it says we are have too much stuff...

well...in my case it does...

i just cleaned off my desk and little file box and office table...
it took me 3 hours...

to.much.crap.

Yandie, Goddess of Pickles. said...

I've just named you queen overlord for the day. I don't usually pass on blog awards because A) I'm greedy and B) I worry that I'm pushing people into obligation, but this one was kind of fun.