Tuesday, July 29, 2014

blaa blaa blaa.

So. Little Scotia has been all about THE INTENTION of creating. But, It's half way through the summer, and I haven't sewn a stitch.

Well, that's a fib. I've done some embroidery. But I really havent completed anything. It leaves me feeling a bit disappointed in myself.

It's been 2 years, and I'm realizing that I'm REALLY having a difficult time juggling kids and home and work on my own. Or maybe I'm just reviewing the past with rose coloured glasses? I'm getting no sewing done. However, I'm 10 hours a week at the thrift store, and about 15 hours a week at tarot and Reflexology. Which really doesn't sound like a lot, but my days are chopped up into little pieces. If I have an appointment at, say, 11am, I will be incapable of doing anything in the morning but wait around for that 11am. I'll be done by 12:30, or sometimes 2, and the rest of the afternoon is SERIOUSLY spent waiting around for 4, when I will start dinner.

It's all in my head, I know.

And the Universe has repeated to me last week, over and over, that I MUST SAVE MYSELF. There will be no lotto, only my own genius and action to work on getting ahead.

My brain doesn't do very well with the division, I think. I seem to recall, when I was crafting and only doing markets, I was earning more in pocket, than I am now, juggling all the things.

I keep checking in with the Universe about the Little Cottage House that will be mine... Sigh.

Working on raising my vibration to meet it. But, I also have to change something to raise my income. And still maintain house and family.

I'm ranting. I should be sewing. But everyone knows you can't work on anything when your vibration is low.

Going to listen to some music. And ponder.