Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Twist Twist Twist.

Last night, a major part of my dreams were about me wanting my old studio space back... a woman (who is a major player in my home business , makes the big bucks and drives the BMW.) had my old studio. She was making a few crafts, and having great success, and she was moving up to a new studio in Toronto. I wanted my old studio space back, badly. I was thinking of what I could do in it to make it work better - more tarot and witchy business, but still have a place to craft.  The rent was the same, and I wasn't sure I could afford it, but I was trying to figure out a way to get back into it. I missed it terribly.

A few nights ago, I dreamed that I was searching very intensely for a place to have a tarot card studio, in the downtown area. They all wanted the same rent, and again, I wasn't sure I could afford it, but I believed in my idea enough that I was going ahead with it.

These dreams have me ... confused. Why am I getting these messages now? I've been out of my studio space for almost 3 whole months. I have a part time job that is good, and it's helped get us ahead. There's been little time for anything else really. On the days I work, I've been passing out around 6 or 6:30 on the couch, until anytime between 11:30pm and 1am. When do I think I'd have time to run a studio space?

It still pains me, in waking life, that I don't have my little space. It was cute, and perfect, and I loved it. I was so productive, and I was doing a lot of readings there, and it was doing so well. Maybe it's this summer weather? I had plans for summer that would have kept me busy and gotten us ahead.

Are these dreams about reconciling this? Or about the next step? Is there actually a next step, because the last 3 months have been lived in the moment - no looking on the path ahead.

While I watered the garden this morning, I thought about these things. And came to no conclusion - not even the flicker of the beginning of an idea about it.

My dreams for the last 2 weeks have been VERY real, complete start to finish stories. I think I'm doing most of my joyful living within them. I've been writing them all down.

So, I have to go to work now.

I'll have to bring a note book incase an "aha!" thought about this whole thing, sneaks up on me.


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